Q & A: Communicating Sexual Needs

How do I communicate with my husband concerning my sexual needs?

Communication between couples to talk about sex is one of the most difficult aspects of the marriage in the eastern cultures. That’s because we have not learned to express our feelings honestly with respect to sex, because they always told us: “It’s a taboo and a sin!”

But you should know that the failing sexual relationship will make a marriage fail by 90% chance, therefore, improving the sexual relationship is one of the basics of a successful marriage.

A woman’s body works differently from a man’s with regard to sexual pleasure. Women are more complicated to reach orgasm, and their erogenous zones differ from those of men. Therefore, the husband should learn these things from his wife.

In order for the husband to please his wife, he needs to hear from her what she likes and what makes her enjoy sex. The woman can start finding out what makes her happy while exploring her own body by touching her own erogenous zones, for example, around the clitoris, nipples, and between the thighs, and then asking her husband to do the same during their intimate relationship.

There are many educational books in the field of sex education. I would suggest that you buy a couple of these books and read them together and to try to apply the information. Commercial pornographic material is the worst source of information you can have, and may even cause several problems, so try to avoid them as an educational guide.

Also good personal hygiene, including daily showers and oral care, and making a daily ritual of kissing and hugging each other; a habit that should not be waived under any circumstances, will bring you physically and emotionally closer, which will make you more willing to be intimate.

You must speak with her husband about your wishes and concerns, using a positive and encouraging approach. Not talking about the subject will certainly lead to the failure of this important aspect of marriage. So, do not hesitate to approach your spouse using a friendly and loving attitude. If you’re too shy to talk about it, try writing him a letter.

Go for it!